


The Reason Is You

by LilyK



Category: The Sentinel
Genre: Angst and Feels, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-03
Updated: 2018-05-03
Packaged: 2019-05-01 18:08:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,384
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14526240
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LilyK/pseuds/LilyK
Summary: Jim and Naomi talk over some important things. Set after TSBS.





	The Reason Is You

  
\-----------------------------------------------  
  
I've found a reason for me, to change who I used to be  
a reason to start over new, and the reason is you  
\--hoobastank--  
  
\-----------------------------------------------  
  
From his place on the sofa, Jim Ellison grimaced and shifted his aching leg. The knee that had taken the bullet from Klaus Zeller's gun two days ago throbbed painfully in spite of the half dose of pain medicine he'd taken when he'd first laid down to try and sleep. With a sigh, he tried to ignore the pain. Dialing back didn't seem to be working, and waking Blair to talk him through it after his long day wasn't something Jim would allow himself to do. Buck up, he coldly told himself.  
  
Earlier, the stairs to the loft's upper bedroom had looked like a mountain when he'd stood at the bottom looking up. Rather than scale them, Jim had sent his partner to sleep in his bed while he sacked out on the sofa since Blair's room was currently being occupied by their house guest. Now, three hours later, he was restless and uncomfortable. He sighed deeply and tried to fluff the pillows into a more comfortable lump.  
  
“May I get you an ice pack?” a woman's soft voice asked.  
  
Jim glanced up into the concerned blue eyes of Naomi Sandburg. “I'm okay.”  
  
“Jim, you don't look okay.” Naomi walked gracefully to the refrigerator, where she extracted the large reusable ice pack that his doctor's office had provided, from the freezer. “Here you go,” she said, wrapping the cold item in a clean dish towel.  
  
“Thanks,” Jim said, wrapping the offering around his knee. He lay back against the pillows and sighed gratefully when the cool relief started to seep into his skin.  
  
“Can we talk?” Naomi asked, perching on the edge of the coffee table.  
  
“Can't sleep?”  
  
“No. You?”  
  
“No.” Jim turned his face toward the upper bedroom and he focused briefly before turning back to Naomi.  
  
“Do you do that often?” Naomi asked.  
  
“What?” Jim asked, trying to keep the terseness from his voice.  
  
“Listen to Blair,” she said softly.  
  
“I don't --”  
  
“Please, Jim.” Naomi's voice was hesitant; a hint of pleading tinged her words.  
  
Jim looked into her eyes and nodded. “Yes. It helps...” He waved a hand haphazardly through the air.  
  
Naomi nodded in understanding. “Good. I knew you were special. And I appreciate that you look out for my son. Especially now....” Her gaze flicked away and she fidgeted minutely.  
  
“Now that he's considering the Academy?”  
  
“Yes.” After a brief pause and a small sigh, Naomi said, “I'm not happy with his decision.”  
  
“Are you going to try to stop him?” Jim asked, again struggling to keep the irritation from his voice. While he had forgiven her for meddling with Blair's dissertation, he hadn't forgotten the last week and the turmoil that Naomi had caused.  
  
Naomi's gaze met Jim's. Her eyes searched his face before she spoke. “After what I did this week -- with Sid Graham -- Blair's dissertation -- no. I have no intention of interfering. I've learned my lesson. I know Blair's forgiven me this time, but the next time I might not be so lucky.”  
  
Jim shifted and nodded, relieved that it seemed, this time at least, that Naomi considered her actions inappropriate. “I'm glad you realize your mistake.”  
  
“Do you also?”  
  
Jim's head jerked up. “What?”  
  
“I'm not the only one who's made mistakes. I'm sure you're aware of what I'm talking about.” When Jim's eyes slid away, Naomi slipped to the very end of the coffee table and leaned her hands on her knees. She waited until Jim's gaze returned to meet hers before she asked, “Do you love my son?”  
  
“That's none of your-”  
  
“If you can't tell me, then maybe I'm wrong to feel that you can protect him. Maybe I'm wrong about a lot of things, especially about what kind of a man you are.”  
  
“Blair's my best friend. He's a good man and he'll be a good cop.”  
  
“That's not what I asked you.”  
  
“I don't-” Jim's eyes flicked away.  
  
“Please, Jim,” Naomi pleaded. “If you can't admit to me how you feel about Blair, and how you hurt him with your mistrust, how can I trust you to love and protect him? It's important to me that I know.”  
  
“I'll keep him safe,” Jim said shortly.  
  
“I know that, but this is different. Can you answer the questions? Do you even know the answers?”  
  
Jim pinched the bridge of his nose with his thumb and forefinger before he crossed his arms and looked directly at Naomi. “I didn't mean to hurt him,” Jim answered, his voice barely a whisper. When Naomi didn't respond, but sat watching him carefully, he sighed and added, “He's the most important thing in my life.”  
  
Naomi's face broke into a wide smile. “In that case, there's something I need to tell you. Blair and I talked all night last night. We held each other and we even we laughed a little. He talked more than he's talked to me in years. And he told me something I think you should know.”  
  
Jim raised a hand. “Don't betray anything to me, any confidences that you know you shouldn't. You owe Blair that much loyalty.”  
  
Naomi blushed, the jibe obviously hitting home. “It's true that I've overstepped my bounds this week. It's also true that some of the things we talked about were meant for just the two of us, but not this. He didn't ask me to keep this to myself and I don't think I should. Blair loves you. He wants to be more than partners on the force with you, and more than to continue living in your spare bedroom. He wants a life with you, and I think you're the only person in this world who can truly make him happy.”  
  
“I don't know what to say.”  
  
“Say what's in your heart. What do you want?”  
  
Jim glanced nervously away. Naomi shook her head.  
  
“If you can't admit to me, somebody who loves Blair more than anything in the world, how you feel, then how would you ever be able to be in a same sex relationship with my son? You can't think he'd be happy hiding you as his lover for the rest of his life!”  
  
“But this is different,” Jim said sullenly. “You're his mother! How can you even expect me to talk about -- sex with Blair with you!”  
  
Naomi rolled her eyes. “I'm not asking for the gory details. I just want to know if you love him. Do you deserve my beautiful son?”  
  
Jim closed his eyes and remained silent for a long moment. Finally, he opened them and looked confidently at Naomi. He was adamant when he said, “I want what he wants. I want to try and have a life together -- beyond the force and being just friends.”  
  
“Then tell him.”  
  
“I don't know... It's too much too fast.”  
  
“I never figured you for a coward. Just be honest and say what you feel. He'll listen. I know Blair. His heart is ready for this. He's ready for you.”  
  
“So you're okay with your only child being in a same-sex relationship? What about grandchildren, and a big wedding, and a house in the suburbs?”  
  
Naomi laughed lightly. “I love Blair. Blair loves you. If you're what makes him happy, then who am I to demand something else?” The smile faded quickly when she said, “Just a few days ago, I did something entirely unconscionable. I almost destroyed my son -- and you. I've learned my lesson. I'm not a stupid woman.”  
  
“I know that,. I never thought you were.”  
  
“So you'll talk to him?”  
  
“Yes. I'll talk to him.”  
  
“Will you be sure he knows that you'll never mistrust him again? That you'll never think he'd deliberately hurt you, and that you will do everything to be worthy of him?”  
  
“For God's Sake, Naomi. You make me sound like a real bastard.”  
  
Naomi again used her best weapon, silence.  
  
Jim's jaw clenched and he stared into Naomi's face before he finally admitted, “Okay. So I jumped to conclusions.”  
  
“I'd say so.”  
  
Jim rolled his eyes. “I didn't mean to hurt him.”  
  
“You were so worried about yourself that you never saw Blair. You know what kind of man he was, and is. Do you think it was fair at all?”  
  
Shaking his head, Jim said, “No. No, it wasn't. I was hurt. I was -- scared. But you're right.”  
  
“See! I said you weren't a coward. It took a lot of guts to admit that. I'm proud of you. And I'm proud that you and my son will be together. So you'll tell him?”  
  
“Damn, but you're pushy. Almost as pushy as Sandburg.”  
  
“When?” Naomi insisted, arms crossed.  
  
It was apparent that she wasn't letting this go, so Jim just sighed again and said, “Is in the morning good enough for you, or do you want me to wake him up and tell him right now?” he asked, raising an eyebrow and giving Naomi a conspiratorial grin. “We could drag him out of bed this minute and hit him with the news.”  
  
Naomi laughed. It was a melodious sound that made Jim smile. “In the morning is fine.” She rose and gave Jim a knowing glance. “You know something? You're a very nice man when you want to be. You have a good sense of humor. You just need to use it more often.” Before Jim could respond to Naomi's keen observations, she asked, “That knee feeling any better?”  
  
“It's fine. Thank you.” Jim reached out and touched Naomi's arm. “For everything.”  
  
“I'm the one who should be thanking you. You forgave me after I did something incredibly stupid. You're a good man.”  
  
Jim blushed under Naomi's bright gaze. “Thanks.”  
  
“So, I'm going to pack and be off.”  
  
“It's barely three am.”  
  
Naomi laughed. “I have a six o'clock flight to Maui.”  
  
“But Blair-”  
  
“We said our goodbyes last night. I would never sneak off and not say goodbye to my son. What kind of a mother do you think I am?”  
  
Jim had the grace to blush. “Sorry. I just...”  
  
Naomi laughed lightly, leaned down and kissed Jim's forehead. “You were worried about him.”  
  
Jim shrugged, making Naomi lightly tap Jim's shoulder. When he raised his face to meet her gaze, she smiled. “Act all macho around me, I don't much care. I know I'm leaving my only child in good hands.” When Jim rolled his eyes, Naomi laughed. “You're a romantic. You just wait and see. You'll be wining and dining Blair. You'll bring him flowers and buy new satin sheets.”  
  
“Naomi!”  
  
The light tinkle of her laughter followed her as she went to pack her bags. Jim grinned and carefully snuggled down into the sofa. His knee had stopped throbbing and sleep tickled at the corners of his mind. With a satisfied smile at the thought of sharing breakfast with Blair, and sharing a life with Blair, Jim fell asleep.  
  
\-------------------------------------------  
  
“Morning, Jim!” Blair's bright voice called from the kitchen.  
  
The tantalizing smells of cheese and green pepper omelets, crusty buttered toast and hot, fresh coffee woke Jim. He grinned and peered over the back of the sofa.  
  
“Morning, Chief.”  
  
“Hungry?”  
  
“Starving.”  
  
“Breakfast in ten.”  
  
“Sounds good.” After pulling off the blanket, Jim carefully swung his legs to the floor. He scratched his belly and stretched, thankful that although he was awake, the injured knee still seemed to be sleeping. He rose and turned. That's when he saw the breakfast table, set for two, as usual, but there was a definite change this morning.  
  
A pitcher of white daisies graced the center of the table, along with the good dishes from the top shelf and the silver that Jim's father had passed onto him from his mother. Cloth napkins were neatly folded beside each dish. The milk for coffee had been put into a small pitcher instead of the usual half-gallon plastic jug that was generally plunked onto the table. Even the butter was in its own serving dish.  
  
“Sandburg?” Jim said, waving a hand toward the table. Looking at his partner, that's when Jim realized that Blair was dressed in a soft, royal blue shirt, his personal favorite, and worn jeans. His feet were bare and his hair was washed and combed, looking quite inviting to Jim's feasting eyes.  
  
“Jim, man. I heard... Sorry. I woke up and you guys were talking and I sort of listened in.” Blair grinned and shrugged, clearly not the least bit apologetic. Moving closer to the sofa, his smile faded and he asked, “You pissed?”  
  
Jim shook his head. “No, I'm not pissed. I just wanted to tell you in a more appropriate manner. Overhearing isn't exactly the same as sitting you down and telling you face to face that...” Jim paused while he moved closer to his partner. “...I love you, Blair.” Leaning down, he gently placed a chaste kiss on Blair's lips.  
  
“Oh, man,” Blair whispered. “That's so sweet.”  
  
Jim rolled his eyes. “Sweet?”  
  
Blair laughed before turning back to the stove. “Oops. Almost burnt the omelets. Sit down. Breakfast is ready.”  
  
Jim sat in his usual spot and watched Blair bring the food to the table. The smells made his mouth water. He realized that he hadn't been all that hungry the past week. His appetite seemed to have abruptly returned full force.  
  
“I'm famished.”  
  
Blair served an omelet onto each of their plates. After setting the pan in the sink, he brought the pot of coffee and plate of toast to the table.  
  
“Looks great,” Jim said, eying the nicely-done omelets. “And so do you,” he added playfully.  
  
Blair laughed and skirted Jim's chair, standing behind his partner. He slipped his arms around Jim's neck and leaned against the back of his chair. Pressing his lips to his almost-lover's ear, he whispered, “I love you too. After breakfast, we'll talk.”  
  
Jim's hands wrapped around Blair's arms. He rubbed the warm skin. “After breakfast, I have a lot of things I'd like to say to you. Then after that, we'll do a lot more than talking.”  
  
Laughing, Blair sat down and together, they shared their first breakfast together as partners, friends... and lovers.  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Originally published about 2011.


End file.
